And The World Shows It's True Colors Again

     I am in this state where I feel like I have a lot to say, but words do not do it justice.  These past few weeks have felt like one huge dream {more like a nightmare}, and I am just waiting for that moment for someone to wake me up?  Time is passing, and everything just seems surreal.  About three weeks ago my cousin went missing in Alaska.  As an Airman in the Air Force, they declared him AWOL after missing just one day of work.  When I first learned about him missing I was thinking it was some kind of misunderstanding and that he would show up {I mean, afterall, people only disappear without a trace on TV, right???}.  After about a week of no contact with anybody, I began to think there was something really wrong.  In an effort to aid in the search my aunt and uncle headed up to Alaska.  There was a great presence of volunteers searching for him, both military and townspeople.  But all I could do was pray, wait by the phone, or check Facebook for any and all updates.  My heart was aching for my aunt and uncle as I knew that with each passing day that the prospects of a good outcome diminished.    Last Tuesday we received news that a body had been found, but it was not until Wednesday that it was identified as being that of my cousin.  I am amazed at the outpour of support, especially by those who didn't even know him or our family.  My heart really aches to know that the world lost a person with such heart and such vibrance for life.  My cousin was always there and ready to put a smile on your face.  And at a time when he was just finding his niche and his passion it was all taken away.  Right now I am trying to understand, knowing I probably never will.  Praying for the day that I can forgive the person(s) that did this.  It leaves me in a saddened state, once again seeing the ugliness of this world.  But now I know to hold my kids even closer.  To never forget to say I Love You!  To let them know that there are dangers in the world, but there will always be a safe place at home.